mos coaching tips
The Pitfall of Talking the Majority of the Session
In coaching and development sessions, one of the most critical challenges leaders face is talking too much. While sharing knowledge and insights is important, excessive talking can overshadow the purpose of the session: to develop others. The objective of these sessions is to facilitate growth, encourage reflection, and empower team members to think critically and take ownership of their development. Over-talking can stifle these outcomes, leading to disengaged participants, missed opportunities for learning, and a one-sided dialogue where the leader's voice dominates rather than fostering a balanced exchange.
Write your awesome label here.
The key to an effective development session is active listening and encouraging participants to think through solutions. When leaders talk too much, they risk overwhelming the participant with information, which can cause confusion or inhibit creativity. Moreover, constant talking can give the impression that the leader is more interested in asserting their own ideas than truly understanding the needs or challenges of the person being coached. Leaders should aim to create an environment where participants feel valued and empowered to share their thoughts, ideas, and concerns. Development happens when participants are encouraged to reflect on their own experiences, not just absorb information from the leader
Overcoming the tendency to talk too much requires self-awareness and discipline. Here are five tips to help leaders strike the right balance during coaching and development sessions:
1. Practice Active Listening
One of the most effective ways to reduce over-talking is to focus on listening more. Leaders should consciously pause after asking a question and allow time for the participant to respond fully. Practice being present in the moment and resist the urge to interject. Active listening shows respect for the other person’s thoughts and encourages more in-depth discussion. It also helps the leader understand the participant’s perspective, which is crucial for effective coaching.
2. Ask Open-Ended Questions
Instead of offering solutions or opinions right away, ask open-ended questions that prompt reflection and discussion. For example, instead of saying, “You should do X,” ask, “What do you think is the best approach to this situation?” Open-ended questions encourage participants to explore their own thinking and develop problem-solving skills. This technique also gives the leader more opportunities to listen rather than talk.
3. Embrace Pauses
Silence can be uncomfortable, but it’s a powerful tool in development sessions. Pausing allows the participant time to think and respond thoughtfully, rather than feeling rushed. When leaders fill every silence with their own thoughts, they prevent participants from reflecting or engaging in deeper thinking. Embracing pauses gives space for productive reflection, allowing participants to arrive at their own insights.
4. Limit Advice-Giving
Leaders are often seen as problem solvers, which can lead to a tendency to offer advice too quickly. However, advice-giving should be balanced with encouraging self-discovery. Instead of immediately offering solutions, guide the participant to think through the problem themselves. This empowers them to build confidence and enhances their critical thinking skills.
5. Set Clear Boundaries for Your Talking Time
To ensure you’re not dominating the conversation, set a mental timer for how long you speak at a time. If you catch yourself talking for more than a few minutes, it’s time to pause and give the other person space to contribute. Leaders should aim to create a dialogue, not a monologue. By being mindful of speaking time, leaders can ensure the conversation remains balanced.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the purpose of a development session is to help others grow. Leaders who dominate the conversation hinder that process. By actively listening, asking open-ended questions, embracing pauses, limiting advice-giving, and setting boundaries on speaking time, leaders can create an environment where participants feel empowered to take ownership of their growth. This leads to more meaningful development outcomes and stronger, more engaged teams.